TalesFromYourServer: I hate when guests come into ‘our space’

(Mobile, sorry!)

Anyone else get severely agitated when guests make a point of going behind the host stand, going into the service alley, walking right up to expo, etc? Like, I’m usually unbothered by rude guests. But for some reason this REALLY gets under my skin.

I was closing as an SA/hostess a few nights ago. I usually serve, but I’m the location’s veteran hostess and they’ll put me on high volume nights if they really feel like they’ll need it. Being an SA of course means I bus and reset all of the tables alongside hosting. I like to think I’m an excellent worker when it comes to this especially – I always deliver servers their cash tips so they don’t sit out on the table, I chase down guests who leave items behind, I put things like phones and forgotten cards in the office for safekeeping if they’re already gone (trust me, this is relevant).

So I’m standing by the dish tank at about 11 or so. End of the rush, I’m just clearing tables and cleaning up. Our tank sits right by the entryway to the kitchen from the service alley, and our service alley is wide open to the whole dining area, with the restrooms right next to it. You almost have to walk in there to use the restroom. I feel like this gives guests the idea that they can just walk wherever the fuck, but, moving on.

I suddenly hear a slightly slurred “Hey! Hey!” From a guest who had left about 10 minutes ago. She’s standing in the deepest part of the service alley, yelling at me through the doorway into the kitchen. Immediately my blood is boiling. I try to quickly drop everything I’m holding, but before I can advance she sees I’ve acknowledged her and she apparently can’t help but step into the kitchen to continue making drunken noises at me.

Already now, the whole staff has noticed, and they’ve approached as well. They all look either bewildered or irate that this woman just stepped into the back to shout at us. She explains to all of us that she left her phone here and she NEEDS it. I tell her I was the one who cleaned off her booth, and there was no phone on the table or seats.

“Maybe someone stole it.”

“I don’t believe so ma’am, I was clearing your table before you walked out the door. I promise I would have seen someone take it if they did.”

“Well maybe YOU stole it” she sneers.

At this point I’m like ready to fight her. Full on fistfight, let’s go you drunk ass bitch. My manager suddenly walks up and sees the tension in my body language and steps in. He tells her the same thing I did. Now her husband comes back and is trying to tell us we have it, too. The manager is trying to tell her to back up, gently shooing her backwards, but she keeps stepping up in his face. Employees watching are all livid now and loudly whispering right behind her about how drunk and stupid she is. Of course, she is too drunk and stupid to notice this.

At this point I’m beyond furious. I look at her deadass because she’s still accusing me. I sarcastically try to put my hands into my fake pockets. I pat myself down. I then walk away wordlessly to her table. I pull out the seats of the booth, I lift the table cloth, I flip my head upside down to look under the table, and I generally make a scene of looking for it. I gesture wildly at the barren table.

“Imagine that, no phone.”

My manager is now looking at me with a mixture of fear and trying not to laugh. The drunk lady is still stammering and slurring. I throw my hands in the air and walk away.

Not even moments later, the husband comes inside, as he had just went to “check the car for the THOUSANDTH time.” Her phone is in his hand. It was in their fucking car the whole time. They just LEFT. No apology.

Drunk? Sure. Loud? Whatever. Rude? Cool. But stay the fuck out of my space, and don’t accuse me of theft. I still get mad over how fucking dumb this couple was.

Tl;dr drunk lady storms into the service alley/kitchen saying she left her phone behind, I tell her it’s not there, she accuses me of stealing it. I proceed to pat myself down and rip apart her table, embarrassing the fuck out of her, only for her to be doubly embarrassed when her husband informs her that her phone was in the car all along.

By: stellarwatermelons